this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2024
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[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 189 points 3 months ago (7 children)

Authorities say that HOA members first summoned police due to reports of “children running an illegal lemonade stand on county right of way.”

When the sheriff’s deputies arrived, they “found that the children were not blocking the roadway but did ask them to move back from the road a few feet for their safety.”

Thinking the matter was resolved, the officers then moved on to other calls about parking issues in the area, only to head back to the scene of the stand when the “original reporting parties came out and began yelling at the children claiming they were on private property.”

As the refreshment row reached fever pitch, the officers discovered that the children running the stand themselves lived within the HOA and that the lemonade pushers “had a right to be there” on the association’s communally held property, leaving the wayward youths to continue their street war against scurvy.

Assholes.

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 112 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Run for your local HOA to dismantle and disband it if you have one. Make it your platform and every person who's ever gotten a petty ticket from a nosy nobody will vote for you.

[–] SirEDCaLot@lemmy.today 54 points 3 months ago (1 children)

This right here is the answer. HOAs usually have fairly complicated rules, but they're absolutely are and are required to be bylaws that dictate the operation of the HOA, how board members are elected, what responsibility is the HOA has to the residents, etc. A big part of why HOAs get out of control is because the only people who bother to serve on their boards are the busybodies you least want in charge of your HOA. So simple solution, run and get yourself and your friends elected. Then then when you have power over the HOA, push through a bylaw amendment that significantly restricts the HOA's authority and makes it very difficult to get it back. IE, The HOA may not create any new rule or regulation or penalty governing what people do on their private property without an in-person vote at a meeting where at least 90% of the residents personally show up and vote yes, however the president or board may remove any such regulations or penalties at will.

Or if you have support, just push through a charter amendment that says the HOA ceases to exist on some specific date and releases all CC&Rs for all governed properties.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 30 points 3 months ago (1 children)

This right here.

Figure out how to get elected. Get elected under the 'if you don't like the way the HOA is run, vote for me, my friend, and their friend!’ platform, and then change the fucking rulebook to your liking.

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[–] buttfarts@lemy.lol 42 points 3 months ago (3 children)

I'm on my local strata council and from the earliest meetings discovered my nemesis who is there for exactly the opposite purpose of me. I want a permissive atmosphere that doesn't look for trouble and only responds to actual problems instead of nitpicking to create unnecessary trouble.

My nemesis, on the other hand, is somebody who I believe can only get an erection by covertly causing another human being frustration and torment. By getting myself on council he cannot get rid of me nor can he use his power to abuse me. I have a small but dedicated power base that hates this guy and they all give me their proxy votes at the AGM specifically because I am supposed to sit on him and keep him down as much as possible. If I ever move than someone else will need to take over the job of sitting on him so he doesn't think he has power.

[–] Myr@lemmy.world 22 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Sounds exhausting. I would give my vote to you though, were I apart of that HOA. Good luck!

[–] Default_Defect@midwest.social 11 points 3 months ago

You ARE apart of that HOA.

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[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 18 points 3 months ago

In this area there’s a HOA but most of the people who live here are renters and don’t get a say. This leads to strange regulations that are sometimes impossible to follow.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 56 points 3 months ago

Yes, but let us take a moment to appreciate the journalist's fine end line:

leaving the wayward youths to continue their street war against scurvy.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 32 points 3 months ago

street war against scurvy

I can just hear the guy laughing his ass off while writing this story about the most petty individuals on the face of the fucking planet.

Honestly, if some dick cheese were harassing my kids about their lemonade stand, they would be unwittingly be subscribing to a life time supply of a burning paper bag full of dog shit on their doorstep.

[–] RedditWanderer@lemmy.world 31 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Losers whose entire identity is defined by the tiny amount of power they have.

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 17 points 3 months ago

IRL trolls. Human scum with nothing better to do but shit on others.

Like, get a life.

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] AbidanYre@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

There's a Moby Dick/white whale joke in there somewhere but I'm not clever enough to make it.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 12 points 3 months ago

They should have arrested the adults for harassing the children - could be considered assault under the right conditions.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago

This is the least psycho cop I've ever read about.

[–] andyburke@fedia.io 51 points 3 months ago (17 children)

Can we ban HOAs? You never see a good story about them posted. At best it seems like they lead to boring cookie cutter neighborhoods.

[–] Seleni@lemmy.world 28 points 3 months ago

My aunt lives in an HOA that was formed because the city wanted to cut down a big forested area to make a cookie-cutter neighborhood. The forest protected a watershed and was home to many native animals.

So the few people who lived there formed an HOA to gain all rights to the area; sold a few more properties to developers with strict rules so the houses built didn’t impact the wildlife or water, and set a large chunk aside as a ‘community park’ that really is a forest with a few walking trails and a nice pond.

The HOA fees mostly go towards maintaining the forest; planting natives, paying top-grade arborists to care for the trees, setting up bird boxes, stuff like that.

That being said, I’m well aware that hers is an outlier, and most HOAs are just excuses for bratty busybodies to harass their neighbors.

[–] CluelessLemmyng@lemmy.sdf.org 20 points 3 months ago (4 children)

I have. I've lived in HOAs where utilities, gardening/lawn care, parking lot upkeep, trash/recycling, community center, were taken care of by the HOA.

You only hear about bad HOAs because people in those HOAs only care about property values from aesthetics. In reality, a good HOA is like a properly run union - taking care of its members by providing cheaper, common services via collective bargaining.

[–] SeaJ@lemm.ee 29 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I've lived in HOAs where utilities, gardening/lawn care, parking lot upkeep, trash/recycling, community center, were taken care of by the HOA.

Aside from gardening, aren't those all things a city would be taking care of?

[–] andyburke@fedia.io 24 points 3 months ago

SIR, THIS IS AMERICA.

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[–] Fondots@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

I currently live in an HOA townhome neighborhood, and I'll be the first to say that I'd abolish it if I could

That said, mine isn't too bad.

They have some nitpicky bullshit, doors have to be painted a certain color, trash cans have to be out of sight from the front of your house, we can't have hot tubs, fire pits, or tiki torches, etc.

But they do handle the lawn mowing, snow removal, trash service, have a playground in the neighborhood, and do the roofing and siding for the homes every X years (I forget exactly how often off the top of my head.) and they require you to get your fire place inspected every year if you're going to use it, which I appreciate since I'm connected to my neighbors houses.

Now as far as I'm concerned, my lawn is the size of a postage stamp, I could practically mow it with a weed wacker (which I own because the landscapers do a shitty job around my deck) and I'm perfectly happy to shovel out the 2 parking spaces in front of my house and my like 20ft of sidewalks and front walkway. I also think trash pickup should be on the city government paid for by my taxes, but alas, that's not the case in my town and residents have to figure out trash service by themselves. And I don't give a rats ass if there's a playground in my neighborhood, there's a perfectly fine park about a 5 minute walk away. And for what I pay in HOA dues I could just save up for my own roofing and siding instead and probably get better and longer-lasting stuff.

[–] JollyG@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

My HOA manages communal property (trails, playgrounds, the pool and tennis/basketball courts) and does grounds keeping. They have some rules I find annoying but most of their rules are sensible (like don’t build a fire pit below your deck and don’t block your neighbors driveway with your cars). Ultimately, my HOA is just not that big of a deal. You don’t hear about HOAs like that because they are not interesting enough to post about online.

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[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 3 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Problem is they do serve a purpose. Good for home values (in theory). Bad if you actually want to live in your home.

[–] ShepherdPie@midwest.social 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I've actually seen that HOAs fared the worst after stuff like the 2007 crash and took much longer to rebound versus non-HOA properties.

I'll never understand how banning shit like pickup trucks in driveways has any effect on property values. It's not like they're permanent fixtures that persist from one owner to the next.

[–] halcyoncmdr@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's a mistaken belief that cookie cutter housing is something people actually want as opposed to being something forced upon them since that's all that's built nowadays.

Can't be cookie cutter if you can see differences in the front yard.

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[–] SeaJ@lemm.ee 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Every time I see a good deal on a house, I notice it is in an HOA. It turns out that people calculate the HOA fee into what they can afford so houses in HOAs have to go for less than a comparable one without one.

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[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 43 points 3 months ago

I am once again so glad the subdivision I live in has no HOA.

We have plenty of kids with lemonade stands and people feel free to decorate their homes however they like.

[–] 5in1k@lemm.ee 35 points 3 months ago (2 children)

The person yelling at the kids would not have windows in their house for a while if I lived there.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 20 points 3 months ago

Not having windows? HOA violation. Better call the cops on them.

[–] Doxin@pawb.social 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Did you know you can buy seeds for common weeds?

[–] 5in1k@lemm.ee 3 points 3 months ago

Haha. I do.

[–] AceFuzzLord@lemm.ee 14 points 3 months ago

I hope one day if I ever end up in an HOA that I end up in one where the HOA members all live in it as well. I would take extra care to heavily salinate everyone's yards. Full scorched Earth for everyone!

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Why do some people just wake up in the morning and go "I hate fun. Time to go be a villain in a Disney Channel show today!"

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

We had an almost literal Disney villain as president in 2016 and he might become one again. A lot of people in this country hate fun.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 8 points 3 months ago

Just a reminder that it's not necessary a HOA that is bad, but the people who sit on any decision making within the HOA. Just like the PTA, it seems to attract assholes.

[–] hperrin@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I’m guessing the cops came and shot the kids’ dog.

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[–] BodePlotHole@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

Fucking Summit County. Yuppie hive of scum and villainy

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