Chuck Tingle is THE GUY writing these. All of his library is stuff like this. It's all hilariously out-there gay fantasies.
Here's his Kindle catalogue, with a few snippets of favorites:
https://www.amazon.com/Kindle-Store-Chuck-Tingle/s?rh=n%3A133140011%2Cp_27%3AChuck+Tingle
Bisexually Banged By My Sentient Full Size Candy Bars On Halloween
My Macaroni And Cheese is A Lesbian Also She Is My Lawyer
Pounded In The Butt By My Handsome Sentient Library Card Who Seems Otherworldly But In Reality Is Just A Natural Part Of The Priceless Resources Our Library System Provides
This Pumpkin Spice Latte Gets Me Off In A Fun And Sincere Way Because It’s Okay For People To Enjoy Popular Things Without Being Shamed For The Perceived “Basicness” Of Their Beverage Choices