this post was submitted on 06 Apr 2024
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Trans

726 readers
97 users here now

General trans community.

Rules:

  1. Follow all blahaj.zone rules

  2. All posts must be trans-related. Other queer-related posts go to c/lgbtq.

  3. Don't post negative, depressing news articles about trans issues unless there is a call to action or a way to help.

Resources:

Best resource: https://github.com/cvyl/awesome-transgender Site with links to resources for just about anything.

Trevor Project: crisis mental health services for LGBTQ people, lots of helpful information and resources: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/

The Gender Dysphoria Bible: useful info on various aspects of gender dysphoria: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en

StainedGlassWoman: Various useful essays on trans topics: https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/

Trans resources: https://trans-resources.info/

[USA] Resources for trans people in the South: https://southernequality.org/resources/transinthesouth/#provider-map

[USA] Report discrimination: https://action.aclu.org/legal-intake/report-lgbtqhiv-discrimination

[USA] Keep track on trans legislation and news: https://www.erininthemorning.com/

[GERMANY] Bundesverband Trans: Find medical trans resources: https://www.bundesverband-trans.de/publikationen/leitfaden-fuer-behandlungssuchende/

[GERMANY] Trans DB: Insurance information (may be outdated): https://transdb.de/

[GERMANY] Deutsche Gesellschaft für Transidentität und Intersexualität: They have contact information for their advice centers and some general information for trans and intersex people. They also do activism: dgti.org

*this is a work in progress, and these resources are courtesy of users like you! if you have a resource that helped you out in your trans journey, comment below in the pinned post and I'll add here to pass it on

founded 9 months ago
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https://hexbear.net/post/2226865

You can find further details on how the survey was conducted here (yes I was drunk the whole time). 158 people responded yes or maybe. Noticed the survey here recently and wanted to share.

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[–] Neato@ttrpg.network 26 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Is this just reposting stuff from your hexbear account to evade instance bans?

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 7 months ago (1 children)

she's a trans user posting trans content in the trans subcommunity on the gender diverse instance.

[–] Neato@ttrpg.network 17 points 7 months ago (5 children)

Citing herself on a different account that gets widely blocked. Which, if I'm reading this right, is an instance blocked here.

Is that not against the rules? Defederation evading?

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 7 months ago

No, it's not against the rules. Hexbear is defederated because their users had a tendency to disrupt external instances en-masse. This is not that.

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 7 months ago

people are allowed to be on multiple instances lmao.

Defederation evading?

That's not a thing, people are allowed to be on multiple instances, if they weren't that would go against the free and open nature of the Fediverse don't you think?

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 7 months ago (4 children)
[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 7 months ago (1 children)

At risk of starting it back up again by oversimplifying, there was a contingent of Hexbear users starting shit over here and claiming blahaj was transphobic because they didn’t believe the admins responded to reports fast enough (ie, while they were asleep in Australia). When the admins polled the blahaj user base on whether or not we wanted to defederate and it became obvious that the majority of users wanted to defederate, Hexbear decided to declare that to “protect their users from transphobia” they would ~~take their ball and leave first~~ defederate from blahaj. Part of this was trying to convince everyone on their way out the door that all the trans users should migrate to Hexbear, because they’re soooo much less transphobic 🙄

It left a really nasty taste in my mouth and I trust very little about anyone that comes here talking positively about Hexbear given how absolutely shit flinging the whole thing was. If you want to view it in more detail the relevant threads are in !main@lemmy.blahaj.zone if you go back far enough.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Ughhhh I hate trans infighting. Why'd they have to be asses.

And geez, that's the dumbest complaint. The blahaj admins clearly try hard to do their jobs. What did they expect them to do, never sleep? Entitled behavior. If they want things done faster, they should have offered to help or find help.

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

At the risk of an argument, I don't think its entitled to want an extremely secure place that catches transphobia almost instantly. Trans people imo deserve a place that is theirs. A lot of people in the trans community are very suicidal and deal with a lot of pain and isolation IRL, having a community to go to where they don't have to interact with transphobic bullshit, concern trolling, etc. is a good way to make these people feel more connected and find ways to build support (cheers intro begins playing). There's a lot of ways to make sure this happens, for instance, good mod tools, bots catching bad behavior, an aggressively supportive userbase, and massive mod teams.

Also, Hexbear isn't just an instance, we regularly do mutual aid. I've personally helped 3 homeless trans people get housing via hexbear. And of course I really hope blahaj can do similar too. Its always great to have a backup if something implodes, and its even better if its not a corporate controlled community.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Entitled wasn't the right word for me to use. I meant moreso that it's not wholly realistic. I agree with you that trans people deserve a place to not see that stuff, but I've had times where I've removed comments the second it was posted and two days later I'd still be getting reports because of third party readers with slower refresh rates.

Everybody's working hard to get this place modded more efficiently. This community is only about two months old so we're still trying to figure things out. Most of the stuff that I've had to remove on here requires more investigation than your typical auto mod can catch, although we do have an auto blacklist flagging system. I do want to ensure that this is a safe place for trans people to express themselves.

I'm glad that hexbear has been able to help people out with mutual aid. I passionately believe in the concept of mutual aid. We recently had someone who very well could have ended up homeless and in danger but the community pulled together to get them financial help and a place to stay. I hope that similar outcomes can happen for people who are in need in the future. We have a support network and community in the works right now.

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 7 months ago

Everybody’s working hard to get this place modded more efficiently. This community is only about two months old so we’re still trying to figure things out. Most of the stuff that I’ve had to remove on here requires more investigation than your typical auto mod can catch, although we do have an auto blacklist flagging system. I do want to ensure that this is a safe place for trans people to express themselves.

Yeah my advice would be to just regularly ask if anyone wants to mod, imo. Makes the community more active as a whole because more people get more invested.

I’m glad that hexbear has been able to help people out with mutual aid. I passionately believe in the concept of mutual aid. We recently had someone who very well could have ended up homeless and in danger but the community pulled together to get them financial help and a place to stay.

Yeah I saw that. Was gonna reply myself but looked like the situation was handled. A lot of people really get the concept of mutual aid wrong, some people think its just charity. But no, helping out homeless people means they can also help others in turn. I hooked one of the homeless trans folks I met up with a commune that needed a cook, the people there had missing arms and stuff but had an extra room. So the homeless trans person learned how to cook and everything is going peachy and cute!

I love talking to people all the time so one of the side benefits is I sometimes know people with extra rooms that can help out like this.

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I'll give you the elevator pitch version, because it was a whole thing. In short, Blahaj was one of the first instances that hexbear federated with when they enabled federation. But then they encountered the 196 community, which is very anti hexbear/tankies. A huge fight erupted, with dogpiles and harassment. We talked about defederating hexbear, but they defederated from us before we could.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Dang...I did see a lot of tankie shit in the meta thread. That's too bad it happened like that. Always makes me sad when there's infighting among trans people.

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

as a mod of c/traa on hexbear, yeah if it were me id love to just to link all the trans comms together. having them all split just increases workload and burnout on trans mods of all instances dealing with transphobia and spreads out the trans community too much. this is why we have 23 mods on c/traa, to spread out the annoyance and remove bad content before any vulnerable people see it. we usually remove bad stuff within 5 minutes, no matter the timezone. its also more democratic, less cliquey, and we regularly ask people to mod with no requirement other than being trans/adjacent. in fact, if you asked to mod on c/traa id add you in a heartbeat

there were also some significant issues with dm harassment from 196 users towards trans women, and we're extremely overprotective of our vulnerable users so we're much more likely to pull the plug on federation than other instances if even a few infractions have happened without people being banned/posts removed from that instance.

if it was possible to federate with only the trans communities here, i feel like everyone would agree with it.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 7 months ago (2 children)

That sucks that happened with 196. I blocked it pretty much the day I got Lemmy because I found the content annoying. It seems so out of place on this instance. My experience on here has been good so far.

I agree with you that most people would want to unite if it were only the trans communities on here. The more people, the more support and resources.

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Grain of salt: the Hexbear admins fail to mention any “DM harassment of trans women” (from 196 or blahaj) in their defederation announcement, which seems like a huge detail to leave out if you’re defederating over alleged transphobia.

And spinning stuff like that is why I don’t trust people trying to upsell Hexbear 🤷‍♂️

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Grain of salt: the Hexbear admins fail to mention any “DM harassment of trans women” (from 196 or blahaj) in their defederation announcement, which seems like a huge detail to leave out if you’re defederating over alleged transphobia.

Most defederation announcements don't usually assign a cause, a user usually requests it in a thread and then the admins bring it to a vote if it gets enough attention. I personally voted to stay with blahaj but with the addendum that we ban all regular 196 posters and mods. If you search around you can see a handful of people posting personal experiences with harassment from 196 here. Its been a long time but I recall getting sexually harassed as well, though that user did eventually get banned here much later.

Out of the hundred or so very active trans commenters, only 5 voted to stay federated with blahaj, me included. Though some trans people were very hurt by this, so ultimately I was fine with defed, I voted to stay federated mostly for trans unity reasons.

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

For anyone interested, the Hexbear defederation announcement thread with the specific reasons for defederation listed can be read here.

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Yeah theres a handful of other associated threads related to this topic too. Technically Tomboyshulk referencing chasers in that post was referring to the DM harassment of trans women.

https://hexbear.net/post/1592846

https://hexbear.net/post/373222

There was a refed post where the second one came up. They made a refed post due to a new lemmy feature coming out

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

Not sure what the veganism post has to do with anything. Edit: I think the link was borked for me, it’s working now.

It’s weird that no Meganium97 shows up at all in Blahaj’s modlogs, how’s that happen?

[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

FYI Meganium97 deleted their account suddenly after I posted in our meta comm to please not do the same thing we nearly defederated programming.dev over. (accusing trans users of not actually being trans)

fwiw I anonymized their username when I posted it here but they came forward and apologized but then they started doubling down on it before deleting their account. https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/7453376?scrollToComments=true

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 7 months ago

Thanks for the additional context!

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

Not sure how the modlog works here. Sometimes on hexbear if someone began to post identifying info we don't remove the post, but purge the user entirely from the database so no information is shared in the modlog. Maybe @ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone did similar

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Alright, I’m checking out of this convo because I’ve already made myself and my views on this clear. Please do not reply to me or ping me in this thread again.

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 7 months ago

That was me offering not to block you but have it your way 🤷‍♂️

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

yeah i block it on this account too. far too jarring and it clogs out all the cool lgbt stuff.

im also very serious about my offer to add any trans people here as a mod on c/traa btw. hit me up if you want it 🤣

we even have a super secret evil group chat

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I appreciate the offer, but I've really got my hands full moderating six different communities on here.

[–] kristina@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 7 months ago

yeah feel that. i do just one and its annoying enough

[–] audiomodder@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 7 months ago

I would say you can check my post history if you want details, but it was a pretty divisive and heated disagreement about whether we would continue to be federated or not with them. There were a lot of reasons though.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 4 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

i don’t see any rules against defederation evading. i do think it’s kinda weird of OP to post this here though. why not poll blahaj zone? like what is the goal here lol

edit: oops there was a recent parallel blahaj zone poll that i missed, makes a bit more sense

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 7 months ago (1 children)

She probably saw my survey post and either already had the data or wanted to collect more data. I don't find it too weird.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 3 points 7 months ago

ah i missed that! fair enough thanks for the context

[–] Neato@ttrpg.network 2 points 7 months ago

You're right. This instance doesn't actually have rules per se. And their interface is a bit different than others so I'm only mostly sure hexbear is defederated.