deleted by creator

Did you arrive yet? How is it?

What’s MAID?

To join the matrix trans housing network please message me directly here. It’s invite only.

Chin up! 🐬

At first I kept imagining I’d have some sort of stroke. So I visited my gp to get properly informed and since then I haven’t been afraid anymore. Now I’m still learning how to properly breathe while doing it. Also, sometimes it itches, and so sometimes it doesn’t. I don’t quite get why yet. But it isn’t so bad.

Except UI changes. Those should just stay in progress forever.

I’m on matrix if you wanna chat

For me it didn’t get better, until it did. Patience is key.

I’ve been intensively studying A1 French in my current camp east of Antwerp, as I’ll be entering Wallonia next week and then France soon after that. I wonder what French people sound like when they have a stuffed nose.

deleted by creator

deleted by creator

Ugh, had to wear male clothes because it was quite cold and I can’t afford anything. Went to lots of second hand stores and of the little that fit, I just felt it looked terrible. So, boymoding it was.

Over time it really eats away at me, and I just dissociate. And now I have to heal it again. I’ll be so happy once I had this all behind me. I at least managed to find something unisex and I tossed the male clothes.

Buy ya, after that ordeal, another. Got lasered, and it makes me look like I have facial hair tattooed on or something for about two weeks. Can’t wear makeup.

Can’t wait to exit terminator mode.

On the positive side, I’m currently staying in some family’s garden in Belgium and they’re super supportive. And last week I was in another Belgian family’s garden and they were, too. The hrt also remains solid every single day and I don’t understand how I ever survived without it.

Started on my journey to Turkey yesterday! Gonna get my hair fixed there.

You sound like a modern shaman

Sometimes I wish the earth did that

Interesting question.

You’d have to cancel out the sideway movement of the earth, and it’s going roughly 85000km an hour.

Once you cancel that out, you’ll simply fall down to the sun. But you’d need a very powerful rocket. It’s way easier to get to mars, as comparison.

It’s more realistic to do gravity assists from venus and other bodies, and in that case it’d take years. Just a rough guesstimate would be 10 years I guess? But maybe you’d have to even sling past jupiter or something to really slow down, so then it might be decades.

Dang, we’d have to wear ear protection all day!

How so? I only tried it a little

He’s the ceo of a kids drug, ofc he’s delusional. I just ran into another roblox addicted kid a few weeks ago. Good luck getting that shit out of their brains!

Then you’ll also be surprised to learn that I am insulted constantly and laughed at. Don’t get me wrong, there are lots of great people, but it is naive to think the Netherlands is a tolerant place. When you go through the medical system you face the same attitudes.

The issue is, if you believe in the system, you’ll give it a chance to traumatize you. This is added on top of other traumas such as losing your family, becoming homeless and so on. The trans thing itself isn’t actually the biggest part of it, it’s the culture and the society.

Sure, you could get lucky and have the right gp and meet the right psychiatrist, and then you have to wait 5 years before you get any medical support. I’ve tried. I mean I’ve literally been at a gp that I knew was trans friendly and I told her I was at risk of suicide, and she was OK with that.

And about the medicine, well you can compound it yourself. I honestly can’t live without it, because it is night and day for my mental wellbeing. Without it, it is extremely difficult to live. It’s like you’re in a state of dissociation and it’s painful. It’s quite a complex thing to describe, but you are effectively disabled and are at risk of suicide.