Hi, I’m Amy.

✨ New 🏳️‍⚧️ improved ♀️ version 👩‍❤️‍👩 out 🏳️‍🌈 now! 🎊

I live in Japan. Talk to me about Haskell, Scheme, and Linux.

日本語も通じます。

  • 2 Posts
  • 26 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
Cake day: June 12th, 2023
  • Amy@lemmy.sdf.orgtoTrans@lemmy.blahaj.zone•How's your week been?English
    8·
    7 days ago

    I’ve been losing weight and it just made them more obvious :3 You’re probably OK.

    Which reminds me: I got a “proper” bra at last. Compared with a sports bra where they tend to leak out the sides a bit, actual cups bring everything forward and make my chest look huge (still barely a US A-cup).

  • Amy@lemmy.sdf.orgOPtoTrans@lemmy.blahaj.zone•Dreaming of the starsEnglish
    4·
    7 days ago

    I’m flattered that you felt my ramblings were worth ruminating on <3

    In case anyone’s interested my explanation is below.

    Pretentious nonsense ahead

    This all came from an idle thought I had that transitioning is kind of like if I always dreamed I had magic powers, and then one day it turned out I actually did! Like, a totally impossible dream has actually come true. I am euphoric and very thankful that I get to do this. Unfortunately, a certain author (who shall not be named) has made wizard analogies problematic.

    You are correct that this is a loose analogy. Being an “astronaut” is standing in both for the opposite sex in general, and being trans in particular (I’ll speak in fem terms from now on). Growing up I always fantasized about being a (cis) woman, but I was aware that that was impossible. I’d also heard about trans people, and there was a pretty clear separation between “[cis] women” and “trans women” in my mind. Because I was “obviously” not a trans woman, the latter didn’t hold much relevance to me, and my impossible daydreams were just that. (Transitioning always seemed to me like something I’d definitely want to do “if I was trans”, but I don’t think I honestly thought of trans women as “real” women).

    There’s also some psychology at play here, as you say. ContraPoints talks about it in her video on Envy, but as I learned more and more about trans people, I started to get very jealous: this was clearly a realistic goal for someone like me, if only I was trans. It was one small step (sorry) from there to my egg cracking.

    So while in reality my fantasy morphed from “what if I was born a woman” to “what if I transitioned”, that’s a distinction that perhaps doesn’t need to be made if one is pitching the analogy to be at least partially understandable by a non-trans person. And there’s a bit of irony too to blur the distinction between women in general and trans women in particular, because of course trans women are women 😉

    TL;DR: it’s deliberately vague.

  • Amy@lemmy.sdf.orgtoTrans@lemmy.blahaj.zone•Postal privacy is amazingEnglish
    6·
    12 days ago

    I mean, yeah, privacy is super important, but for international stuff it depends a lot on how they write the customs declaration. When I was on DIY it was usually marked “personal medication” or similar, and none of them were opened (not that it would have gotten seized, but still). OTOH when I used to use and import tobacco, at least 90% of those were opened and assessed for tax.

    I think if any administration tried to crack down on DIY it would just incentivize domestic production instead: inspecting domestic mail is much harder even for a fully authoritarian regime.

    Enjoy your hormones <3

  • Amy@lemmy.sdf.orgtoTrans@lemmy.blahaj.zone•How's your week been?English
    4·
    14 days ago

    Had my first electrolysis appointment to prepare for SRS. Not quite as bad as I was expecting but still… ouch. Six months to a year of this to look forward to, plus the leftovers from laser on my face. This is going to cost a small fortune!

    Apparently they have quite a few MTFs passing through, so I seem to be in safe hands.

  • Amy@lemmy.sdf.orgtoADHD@lemmy.world•How common is it to need to know the absolute inner workings of something in order to do it?English
    2·
    1 month ago

    Oh yeah, I totally get that.

    When I’m doing something for fun, I’m far more interested in the process than the end result, so I’ll do everything from first principles. And probably never finish before I move on to something else. But that’s fine.

    If it’s something I need to get done, on the other hand, then by the time I’ve started we’re probably already into crisis mode, and so getting it complete as quickly as possible becomes the goal. Then I’m all for finding whatever shortcuts I can.

    Fortunately I’ve explored a enough topics (particularly in programming) for fun by now that I have enough background knowledge to be good at it for a career. Experience does build up, and even if you’re jumping around all over the place, eventually you’ll start to see the bigger picture.

  • Amy@lemmy.sdf.orgtoTrans@lemmy.blahaj.zone•HRT and Mental HealthEnglish
    5·
    1 month ago

    I also got my ADHD diagnosed some time after starting HRT. I can’t say whether hormones made it better or worse, but I think I’m more aware of how my mind is working now rather than dissociating all the time. I think going to the clinic for HRT made it easier to go see someone about mental stuff.

    My partner insists I’m ASD as well, which seems plausible. Apparently Trans + ADHD + ASD is kind of a set menu.

    My mood goes up and down a lot more now too, and I tend to burst into tears easily. Which might look like I’m in a worse state, but it’s really just that I’m present finally and I can feel things. Other people have said the same thing, but I feel human at last.

    Oh, and I don’t remember where I heard this, but treating ADHD can cause other mental issues to reveal themselves. So it might not be HRT at fault.