I’m pretty sure that the fox in fox news actually comes from a mispronunciation of the word faux. Faux news.

When I was younger, I used to throw grasshoppers into pens full of baby chicks where they would tear the grasshoppers limb from limb. Also, rats used to live in the henhouse but they don’t anymore because the hens killed all the rats.

I was about to say golf courses, but then I realized that people actually use golf courses to play golf, which is more then the average lawn is used for.

“The bomb partially detonated, resulting in some minor fire damage”

Apparently he isn’t very good at being a terrorist. It didn’t even manage to knock down the door and I can’t even see any damage in the picture.

Sceevy

Um acktsually you could manipulate the keyboard with a low-powered pellet gun

One second, let me try to recreate Ron “I lost a presidential bid to an orangutan” Desantis’s thought process:

Inhale

WE HAVE TO BAN FAKE MEAT BECAUSE ITS MADE BY LIBERAL WOKE COMMUNIST SCIENTISTS THAT WILL LACE IT WITH TRANSGENDERISM AND TURN OUR KIDS GAY OUR REAL AMERICAN KIDS SHOULD ONLY EAT REAL AMERICAN MEAT

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go disinfect my mouth

Unlike billionaires, some parasites are beneficial to humanity (there’s a species of wasp that lays its eggs in plant-destroying caterpillars, and leeches can be used as bait while fishing).

I can absolutely see someone with androgen insensitivity syndrome (female with XY chromosomes) getting thrown in jail for this.

RED: SHADOW MAGGOTS!

zero tolerance intelligence policy

Its a LG Rebel LTE

There isn’t a version of LineageOS available for my phone : (

By that logic, they should ban water pipes to stop people from making water pipe shotguns