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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: October 18th, 2023

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  • Started going to a small local coffee shop a little over two years ago, and I’ll never go back to the giant chains. The people working are always happy, greet regulars by name, always go out of their way to interact or talk with me- usually remember something we talked about before, comp my orders every now and then, host little events, etc. It’s not just them either - I always have a way better experience going to non-chain coffee places. Oh, and the coffee is always waay better and priced better.


  • I very much go through this. It can be hard looking at all the niche things around my house which I spent so much energy pursuing - specialized photography rigs, magic cards, jewelry making tools+storage, exercise gear, crazy keyboard setups for multiboxing, etc. With all of those came the community aspect. I feel so guilty just disappearing after gaining so much attention and recognition in various areas. I can confidently say I’m paralyzed with some type of fear to get into new things- I know they’ll consume me, but then one day I’ll wake up and just see it as a source of stress and drop it. If I had infinite money and loved socializing, I’d not be too stuck, but I just can’t afford to keep cycling through interests right now. The things which tend to interest me always demand a financial sink.






  • I would caution your and other people’s perception of your intelligence as having significance. Doing well academically (especially pre-college) and thinking that this equals intelligence can be a bit of a trap. I, along with other high functioning friends, also did well academically and many people, teachers, peers, etc all viewed us as intelligent - the problem is, we understood expectations and how to create a mask and personal systems which allowed our brains to succeed in school. Entering college, that all changed for us. The expectations changed and the system changed- everything I created for myself to succeed no longer applied. I went from a 4.0 high school student in all advanced classes to dropping out of college the first semester. I saw peers who did terribly in high school thrive in college. I saw how they easily formed new connections and found support which allowed them to continue where I stumbled.

    I would ask yourself what value you are expecting out of being viewed as intelligent and why you feel you might need that label applied to you. Growing up, I personally put a lot of effort into being seen as smart to make up for my ASD thinking I could outsmart it or something. Being 30+ now, I no longer really care how people view me- I just care that they are kind and respectful.



  • My brain shifted towards the end of high school. Growing up, I had an uncontrollable imagination and mental environment - it was essentially a never ending plot line consisting of characters from movies, shows, books, comics- anyone that I found interesting. It was a way to cope. My brain constantly had these characters interact and create conflicts. Their actions and dialog would sometimes spill out into the real world, and I had to remember to keep everything inside. I saw it all in my mind- it was honestly super creative. I eventually wanted it all to stop because I felt like I couldn’t control it, but it took effort. I had to slowly turn the extremely detailed characters into lesser versions of themselves until they were just mental stick figures; eventually, I was able to stop the story as I got bored maintaining personalities for 2d characters.

    I can still access my visual mind, with effort, but it’s nothing like it was. It is now instead a constant inner monologue which converses at nothing- usually it’s about topics which I might have to explain to someone later or a way to navigate my thoughts/feelings. There’s never anyone talking back, just my mind talking at nothing. It can be helpful as my brain bricks during random/spontaneous conversations with people, and I can lean on rehearsed talking points/sentences.

    As for memory- It’s on point when something is actively in my life, but the moment that thing becomes uninteresting or I step away for a few weeks, it feels less accessible and usually makes me super anxious and avoidant. Learning about things initially is super fun, but knowing I’m missing information which I previously was very confident in is tough for me.


  • I have a SUPER random one and have been wondering if anyone else has had a similar experience; I started HRT (patches) and Spiro last week!

    I’m a daily cannabis consumer and have been for many years (🩷Volcano Hybrid). One thing I experience for a few days whenever my tolerance dips, or when in a situation which lowers my tolerance (different location or around different people), is a phantom feeling like I’ve wet myself or feel like I’m about to. It’s something I mention to people who are just starting with cannabis, and I have found it’s very common. It’s not something I’ve experienced in years, and I did not expect a variation of that feeling to return. I know tolerance fluctuates based on a variety of things, so I guess I’m not surprised- just wasn’t something I expected!



  • I would definitely recommend some roguelike shooters like Roboquest, Gunfire Reborn, Crab Champions, etc. These are all 4 players, but you could always have a few different lobbies.

    Maybe also consider something like Palworld, Grounded, Raft, and other Survivalcraft games. There should be a good few in that genre that will allow you all to play together!

    Sounds like a fun group ready for some great memories! Good luck on your game hunt!


  • The only thing I can offer is a small warning. I also was a habitual neck cracker- up until one night where my normal twist had an unfamiliar popping sensation which kind of felt like a muscle snapping. I was then greeted with incredible pain anytime I tried to move my head or just move in general. Had to go to the ER/urgent care that night. The doctor was very straightforward with their advice- there’s no reason I should be cracking my neck and I need to stop. I had pulled one of the muscles and it had severely swelled.

    I also used to crack my knuckles, elbows, back, etc. I eventually stopped by catching myself in the act, acknowledging that I don’t like feeling like I can’t control myself, and giving my hands something else to focus on.

    Good luck!!


  • Started working for my current company as tech support. No degree, in a homeless shelter, just good with tech and helping people. It bothered me not understanding how things I supported worked, so I started to teach myself to code and offer ideas for potential fixes when submitting tickets. Ended up being approached and hired by the head of development who allowed me to continue learning on my own. I’ve been with them for 12 years now, and in the first few years hobbled together the product/feature which became their flagship. Find people who are eager and excited to learn and they’ll thrive.




  • Fortunately, this is something I solved by establishing a set of routines which I do not deviate from. Each day is a repeat with minor variations depending on the day of the week. This helps me keep my place spotless, eliminates any mental energy put towards figuring out what to eat, and makes things like shopping less stressful as I just place the same pickup order each week. The BIG struggle for me is when I make the effort to change my routine for people (friends) to accommodate plans and they cancel on me or try to change them last second. I don’t think they will ever understand how much energy it takes for me to change my day and mindset for them.



  • My favorite has been locally hosting Automatic1111’s UI. The setup process was super easy and you can get great checkpoints and models on Civitai. This gives me complete control over the models and the generation process. I think it’s an expectation thing as well. Learning how to write the correct prompt, adjust the right settings for the loaded checkpoint, and running enough iterations to get what you’re looking for can take a bit of patience and time. It may be worth learning how the AI actually ‘draws’ things to adjust how you’re interacting with it and writing prompts. There’s actually A LOT of control you gain by locally hosting - controlNet, LORA, checkpoint merging, etc. Definitely look up guides on prompt writing and learn about weights, order, and how negative prompts actually influence generation.


  • vibinya@lemmy.worldtoAutism@lemmy.worldResources for adults
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    11 months ago

    I feel this. A few months ago I lost all my energy to maintain my mask- completely removed myself from my friends because I couldn’t be the person I wanted to be for them. The energy it takes to be patient doing things I don’t want to do, showing interest in things I’m not interested in, and supporting people who can’t support me just drains me. While it’s been moderately lonely as I also wfh, it’s a bit liberating having a completely consistent flow throughout my day; all that mental and emotional energy I can now put towards me. Familiar cycle though… Once I glue my mask together, we go again!