I’m guessing Henrietta Lacks, since she’s probably got a bone to pick with the research community as a whole. I bet she’s got some special accommodation with the universe to be brought back constantly as a stream of lab animals, just to fuck with the data.
Revenge is a dish best served confusingly.
On the plus side, this does show that all the plastic we have put into the environment has been a niche energy source just waiting to be exploited.
Now think about all the plastic surface area in the oceans and stuff, I bet there are other things, bacteria and microfauna, which are actively adapting to consume it.