Take it to the police and ask them. They have a lot of experience with that sort of thing and will be able to give you a super quick response.
Just eat it. The whole thing. One sitting.
No wine pairing or side dish recommendations? Low effort comment smh
Fava beans and a nice Chianti. Everyone knows that, so it goes without saying.
Technically, that’s only for the liver.
For the primal cuts, you can use pork as a general guide, but for best results, you’ll also need to consider and match their dietary habits before deciding on your meal. The heavy sesame, garlic, and red pepper in a traditional Korean diet, or the curry in an Indian diet would clash with the delicate sweetness of an Easter-style ham, for example. You would want them finished with a traditional American or Eurocentric diet for such a dish.
Mmmm
Long pork
Never much cared for it.
Oh, it’s super easy. What’s your address?
It’s super easy, but it depends on your address.
Paint the body black, then follow the usual instructions for hiding the body of a black male.
Find a garage labelled “Dead N***** Storage”
I understand the reference, but this isn’t something you just say, man.
Wow, do this many people really not get the reference? I thought it was funny
You got any pigs handy? The eat anything.
Someone already suggested bringing it to the cops earlier in this thread
Seems like greedy behavior
Call 911, forensics will deal with that for ya 😉
Be warned, they only take the body, you gotta hire a company for the rest of the mess.
The fuck … But also very interesting
The legend of scarabic lives on.
Woodchipper. Just be sure to do it in the middle of the night when it’s impossible for anyone to hear you because they’re sleeping.
Hide it near a police station - who’d ever check near a police station? But make sure it’s very close to it - closer the better; it’s like a spit in their face.
What if they smell it
My spit doesn’t smell that bad.
Paint him brown or black. Nobody will bother to look, and if someone finds him, odds are great that they’ll find some gussied up excuse that he had it coming.
Disguise the body with a fake mustace, nose, and glasses. Now you got a carpool buddy.
The old classics - remove the teeth, hands and any medical implants and find:
- somewhere they are pouring fresh concrete; or
- a newly dug grave awaiting a burial in the morning;
- slice open their gut and dump the weighted corpse out into deep water.
Then come back and tell us all about it.
That concrete idea is genius. Has it proven effective in the past?
The smell will permeate. Mythbusters tried it with pig carcasses.
Dump the body in a self driving car. By the time they find it while digging out the car, you’ll be miles away.
Only if they’re not a three thousand year old vampire. In that case YMMV.
It didn’t work out well in this case
I don’t think it has ever been proved.
So, for example, the Krays were at their height atvthe same time there was a lot of road building in London, and people have suggested bodies went into the Chiswick Flyover:
There were rumours that victims of the Kray brothers, including Ginger Marks who shot Jack “The Hat” McVitie, were interred among the 100-tonne concrete support columns.
And the Bow Flyover:
The Bow Flyover in East London where legend has it that the body of Frank ‘the Mad Axeman’ Mitchell, one of the twins’ victims, is buried in the concrete.
In fact, Jack “the Hat” McVitie may have suffered a similar fate:
Reggie stabbed Jack the Hat McVitie and the body was buried in the concrete foundations of a supermarket.
The problem I’d you’d need to demolish any structures to discover the truth, although given the age of them, some are being taken down these days so… Similar rumours emerged during the demolition of a bridge near Glasgow:
THE Kingston Bridge may give up a grisly 30-year-old secret in the next few weeks - the bodies of murdered criminals.
The bridge is widely believed to be a concrete tomb for several notorious gangsters who disappeared mysteriously in the late 60s.
Glasgow godfather Arthur Thompson, who died six years ago, is said to have ordered them killed and disposed of in the concrete piers of the bridge while it was under construction.
Now the piers are to be broken up and the truth might finally come to light, including the solution to the mystery of Archie McGeachy, who was 22 when he vanished from his Govanhill home in 1969.
Jack “the Hat” McVitie is still unaccounted for but there are other suggestions about his final resting place:
The body was never recovered, although in an interview in 2000 (which featured Reggie Kray giving a frank account of the activity of the Firm twelve days before his death) Freddie Foreman admitted to throwing McVitie’s body from a boat into the sea at Newhaven, Sussex, although he was also reported to have been buried in a newly dug grave at Gravesend Cemetery in Kent.
Which takes us neatly back to the other suggestion - in a newly dug grave.
However, one of the people at the murder has confirmed McVitie was dumped at sea, even if the longer journey carried the risk of discovery, as described by Chris Lambrianou.
Also the police found a body under the patio at the home of an associate of the Krays. So the means of body disposal was likely pretty crude and simple.
Gonna need a rug and some moving dollys
Be mindful of a pig farmer
Only if the pigs have been starving for a few days….
How long do you need to hide it for?
A locking chest freezer has proven handy for me in the past.
I think they need to hide a whole body, not just the chest.
You’re right. This is really lacking details.
How white is the guy?
There is an old documentary called Weekend at Bernie’s that deals with this in a very overt manner. Might be worth checking out.
Of course, Weekend at Bernie’s it - hide the body in plain sight. As long as it’s not too hot you’ve got a few days to work on a proper plan.
From all the times this is asked on Reddit, apparently you put yogurt up the bum
No! That’s how you get liquid ass!
