• blakestacey@awful.systemsM
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    9 months ago

    Quoted for posterity/convenience:

    in a world of greater legibility, romantic partners would have the conversation about “I’d trade up if I found somebody 10%/25%/125% better than you” in advance, and make sure they have common knowledge of the numbers

    (Marriage makes sense as a promise not to do that period; but if so, you want to make sure that both partners are on the same page about that. Not everyone assumes that marriage means that.)

    Her: I am never, ever letting you go unless I find someone 75% better. Me: Works for me.

    oh hello there Performative Allistic Twitter

    • blakestacey@awful.systemsM
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      9 months ago

      Oh look, a clarification:

      It didn’t even occur to me that anyone would read the tweet as being about “25% more general market value” rather than “25% more value to me personally”. Who thinks like that??!?

      Yud is just a uwu neuro-atypical smol bean who is ignorant of generations of cultural context about people rating each other and cannot be blamed for people reading his words in the wrong way instead of the correct, equally repellent way.

      • bitofhope@awful.systems
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        9 months ago

        Ohh, I thought he meant one thing but actually he meant the same thing I thought he did and not the even worse thing I expected he might actually think instead.

        • Amoeba_Girl@awful.systems
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          9 months ago

          I think in this case, market value might have actually been better, in that at least it’s an objective value of something specific instead of reducing your whole relationship with another human being to a fucking variable.

          • blakestacey@awful.systemsM
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            9 months ago

            “Honest, babe, I’d only dump you for a ten-out-of-ten smokeshow as evaluated on my personal scale!”

    • Architeuthis@awful.systems
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      9 months ago

      in a world of greater legibility, romantic partners would have the conversation about “I’d trade up if I found somebody 10%/25%/125% better than you” in advance, and make sure they have common knowledge of the numbers

      To be clear, that world is inceldom and they already have a term for exactly that sort of thing.

      • mountainriver@awful.systems
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        9 months ago

        I have been meaning to ask is there an overlap between rationalists and incels? Or do they both overlap with neoreactionaries?

        At times their idea world appears close to each other.

        • Architeuthis@awful.systems
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          9 months ago

          Absolutely, you can’t keep pandering to the so called anti-woke and not end up with a lot of incel-adjacent people in your spaces, and the eugenics undercurrent feeds directly into manosphere perceptions about optimizing dating and tying your self worth to your splachnocranium/neurocranium ratio.

          More specifically Scott Alexander has pandered pretty aggressively to the Dogged Good Guy demographic, and is also on the hook for being all about the ‘merits’ of neoreaction, and people like Moldbug and Emil Kirkegaard are semi-regulars in his comment sections.

          Also worth noting that before the infamous EY editorial in TIME that called for airstrikes against foreign datacenters to prevent clippy from going rogue, the previous time they covered ea/rat was to report that they appear to have a serious sexual exploitation problem.

          On a more speculative note, some staples of the movement like effective polyamory may have come about directly from early rationalist inability to get any on the regular. Apparently if you go reddit spelunking it appears they also went through a phase of trying to brainwash each other optimize into bisexuality to stave off sexual frustration.

        • Soyweiser@awful.systems
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          9 months ago

          I think the overlap between LW and incels comes more from the pickupartist shit which was popular there for a while. And the incels (ignoring the woman who started the movement and her intentions for it) take a lot of their ideas from the blackpill ‘I tried pua but failed and I have decided it is the fault of the world’ thinking. So there is overlap but not directly, more of a common ancestor.