Not the most recent, because this happened years ago, but I once managed to run over my own hand with an office chair – while I was sitting on it.
That’s pretty amazing actually. How did you manage such a feat?
I noticed I had dropped a piece of paper, and one of the wheels was on top of it. I tried to do a little hop to quickly pull the paper out, and somehow I landed on the hand pulling the paper.
So technically I more hopped onto more than ran over the hand, but I took some narrative liberties for comedic effect.
Thanks for the update. Hopping instead of running over doesn’t take any points from the feat. Good job!
I reached for something. mid-40s…
Left the cupboards open and then did dishes within 5 minutes and after leaning down, I hit my head on one of the open cabinet doors.
I pushed too quickly on my french press and an eruption of hot coffee water shot up the sleeve of my robe, which trapped it against my arm long enough to burn the skin. I am hoping for no blister, but I have a 4cm red triangle on my forearm now.
I was opening a box that was taped shut with a screwdriver, pulling it towards myself to rip open the tape. The rest of the tape went a lot faster than I was expecting, and since I was still pulling I wound up jabbing myself in the stomach (just bruised, I’m fine).
Definitely grabbing scissors or a knife next time and going away from myself!
Definitely grabbing scissors or a knife next time and going away from myself!
Had me in the first half, NGL.
I can’t believe the box was taped shut with a screwdriver
Haha, I probably should have written that more coherently, huh
Gosh that’s usually one of those mistakes you only make once. Just thrust the opposite direction next time please 🙏
I will, and I promise to be controlled and purposeful with my thrusting in the future 😁
Using a mandolin slicer to cut a cucumber, got too close and the tip of my finger ended up in the cuke bowl
Cut-resistant gloves are a must for a mandolin!
Did the fingerprint grow back?
It was still barely hanging on by a bit so I superglued it down, small scar on the side but otherwise back to normal
i continually rotate the angle of the cutted object so that there is more force concentrated at a smaller impact area.
also when i start reaching the end i progressively slow way down. by the time i reach the nub i am either cutting with conventional knife or just slowly forcing the last bit through.
kinda sucks because its supposed to be fast.
A few days ago I cut my finger open on an extremely sharp bread knife. I knew the knife was sharp but I wanted to see how sharp, so I put my finger on it. It turns out that it was sharp enough to cut my finger.
I’m 35.
At least I know the stove is hot
Yes, but how hot is it exactly?
I was opening a sterilizing toothbrush cover and sliced the tip of my finger from the plastic.
Normally that isnt something really to care about, but I play guitar and had a gig the next day.
Playing an acoustic steel string guitar for 45 minutes with a cut on the top of your finger fuckin sucks.
Didn’t you use a guitar pick?
He’s talking about fretting, like when a guitar player presses some strings on the long neck part of the guitar, that makes strings ring out certain notes
Oh…
Yeah haha don’t worry I don’t think most people outside of the world of musicians understand that’s how it works.
What particularly struck me when I picked it up was actually how physically literally painful it was, and the only way it really stops being so is if you develop calluses on your fingers from the repeated injury of pressing the tips into thin metal wires.
A few days ago, I tried to catch up to my 4 year old who was running down our asphalt driveway after getting off the preschool bus, running to the back-left of him, he turned into my path to see where I was, so I sort of “jumped” out of the way to avoid plowing right into him, just barely clipped him a bit but tore up my arm and knee landing on the asphalt. Stupid, because I should have assumed he might decide to change direction or something… seems obvious now.
Before that, a few months ago I was cutting a watermelon and, with my hand that was holding the melon in place, I pulled it up off the melon too haphazardly and the tip of the knife sliced deep into my ring finger. Borderline needed stitches, but didn’t get them. Got by fine with butterfly bandages and wound glue, but there’s yet another big scar on my hands. At least I still have all my fingers. I was given a Christmas gift of a cut glove after that.
I ran with my dad’s dog through the park. He immediately cut in front of me and we both tumbled down. I was pissed for a second and then I thought “wait there’s zero reason to assume this dog knows how to do that”.
Used a chef’s knife to open a beer bottle.
Opened my hand instead. Use tools for what they are made for, boys & girls.
Sledding down a hill. I thought the bottom someone had made a ramp.
Nope.
Giant frozen pothole.
Soon as we hit it I HEARD something snap in back. We flew up in the air. And landed - on ice - I landed on my ribs.
I have managed to injure my spine AND my ribs.
Mine is a textbook example of a self inflicted knife wound that involved separating frozen burger patties with a very sharp knife. Knife slides between the patties and into the palm of my hand. I managed to not pass out and make it to urgent care where they stitched the cut together. Still have some nerve damage. Don’t do stupid things with sharp knives kids.
Or dull knives. Maybe butter knives but that’s as far as I’d go.
A sharp knife is a safe knife, a dull knife is a dangerous knife.
I like “A sharp knife does what you want. A dull knife does what it wants.”
A sharp knife that’s supposed to be sharp is a safe knife.
A sharp knife that’s supposed to be dull (like a butter knife) is a dangerous one.
That’s fair, it is all about the knife being predictable.
Someone had downvoted you and I find that really odd.
I’ve got nerve damage on two fingers tips, one on each hand, from incidents 20+ years apart. Fucking sucks trying to fish a screw out of a small space, stuff like that. And yes, both times I was being extraordinarily stupid and earned a lifetime handicap.
Sleeping. Woke up one day to frozen shoulder. Two years of physio and it’s still not right. Fucking aging. Being 50+ sucks arse.
Our bed adjusts via remote control, which my toddler loves to play with. That little shit tweaked it just enough for me not to notice, but enough for my neck to hurt for an entire week.
I work in a kitchen. Obviously we regularly handle very hot items (food, pans, oil, etc).
My coworker had just pulled a metal pan from a 500°f oven and even called out “BEHIND, HOT!” as she attempted to place the pan on the make table. My stupid ass decided our (mainly clear) make table needed cleared off. So at the very moment she tried to set down a 500°f pan, I shoved my arm directly into her path, causing her to press the pan into my forearm, causing instant second degree burns.
I still have the burn marks and it’s been a week and a half 🙃
Thumbed myself in the eye trying to catch a ball. Saw double for a bit.
Oof 😥
It was an embarrassing moment of obscene un-coordination.
