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  • DigitalTraveler42@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    Bro love your pop divas and live your truth, fuck the haters.

    My stepdad has been a pop music fan all his life, loves Tay Tay and all of the others, and I’ve never thought any less of him, he’s quite literally my best parent and friend by a wide margin. I’m also saying this as a person heavy into metal and rap, because we can all like what we enjoy without begrudging one another for it.

    The best thing you can do is try and find a new therapist that you’re comfortable with, once you find that partnership, if you find it, you’ll feel better about yourself as hopefully that therapy partner will help make you feel better about yourself, like any good therapist should be working towards doing.

  • illectrility@sh.itjust.works
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    9 months ago

    When it comes to appreciating life, I always think about what it actually takes to be alive.

    Think about it. Trillions of cells working together to keep you alive. An immune system constantly defending you from anything and everything, even yourself. The amount of work it takes to live is extraordinary and we don’t even notice it. Life is extremely fragile and short. Every one of us was gifted a very short amount of time on this wild roller coaster we call life. To me that’s something to celebrate.

    If you like pop culture and divas and whatnot, that’s awesome! Being passionate about something is great!

    Truth is, I don’t have any good advice, really. I get where you’re coming from and I feel similar sometimes. Even at times when I feel really down, though, I like to stay up on a night with a clear sky, look at the stars and remind myself of how tiny our planet is. How tiny we are. How huge the cosmos is and how grateful I am for this tiny but bit of time that I get to spend on this Earth, however long it may be.

    While I’m at it, I may as well recommend the Kurzgesagt YouTube channel. It has some great videos on loneliness, gratefulness and stuff like that. Their book “Immune” also really gave me a whole new sense of appreciation for my body and life itself.

    Good luck and never be uncomfortable because of who you are and what you like. Our time here is too short to be wasted on nonsense like that.

  • SuddenDownpour@sh.itjust.works
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    9 months ago

    I tend to like things that are not typically considered socially acceptable for a man: I am a fan of pop culture and pop divas like Taylor Swift, Avril Lavigne, Ariana Grande and Olivia Rodrigo (…) This, along with my general introversion and social fatigue, is one of the reasons I can’t find friends. I can’t find common interests with other men my age. I often found myself in online communities where most of the people were much younger than me and this made me feel uncomfortable, so I left those groups.

    Have you tried going to dancing classes? They may not be a perfect match, but perhaps you’d find more like-minded people there.

  • souperk@reddthat.com
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    9 months ago

    Hey, while our situations are not the same, I highly relate to what you say, remember you are not alone in your struggles.

    For making friends, I recommend looking out for other neurodivergent people, we kinda look out for each other and we understand each other’s struggles. Also, in my experience, LGBTQ communities are more welcome to neurodivergency.

    You kinda need to find a way to socialise while not draining your energy, don’t be afraid to ask for what you need or set boundaries. For example, I have a friend that sometimes we take a walk, pick a bench and just chill there silently.

    For work, I guess any advice would depend on both your needs and your area of work. If working from home isn’t an option where you live, maybe it’s possible to work for a company abroad. Also, don’t be afraid to ask for any accommodations you need, it’s not perfect but it can help a tonne.

    Last but not least, I haven’t tried it, but maybe you can get a therapist online, the online therapy market is booming right now, and there are multiple low cost options/discounts. It may take a while to find a therapist you feel compatible with, don’t be afraid to change if you don’t feel comfortable. Don’t be discouraged if you hear a crazy amount, you will find better deals, lots of these platforms are targeting Americans able to pay for a session more than my take at home income…