Does anyone else have or had a problem creating and maintaining a female self image in your mind? I can barely do it if at all, and it can be a little distressing. I can only see myself as the overly masculine body that I currently have.
I’m not on HRT nor presenting as a woman in public. Maybe if I was my self image would change?
Indeed! When I think about things I’m mostly thinking about properties, relationships, and feelings. I can’t really visualize myself, but I can vividly imagine what it feels like to see myself in the mirror.
I sometimes have a gendered “feeling” about myself that sorta shapes what I expect myself to sound like or be like behaviorally - there is a kind of “being a man” in my own head that can sorta come up more, and then other times I can feel more like a woman - do you have any gendered qualities to those things related to your self concept?
I know that feeling intimately, but being nonbinary it isn’t innately manly or womanly, just “me” or “not me”.
I had to learn how people’s gendered expectations work the hard way, through years of observation and rote memorization.